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My stuff in my new appartment

December 5th, 2008 at 09:09 pm

I went to my appartment a few hours ago to put my things in and my flatmate let me choose which of the three rooms I want. I decided on the yellow room instead because it's so joyful and welcoming. I also like the pink and green room but it is not really my style. As for settling in, some things in the appartment are not yet install so I need to wait a few more days before I can settle in.

My dad keeps telling me that rent is expensive and he won't help me or give me any money. I already knew that part and that living by myself or with my flatmate is not easy at all. My mom badmouthes behind my back a few minutes ago with my brother saying that I trust people too much, my temper is so fierce that I will get beat up some days, as the days go by I become stupid and all that negative things.My brother just says : uuumm... He understands why I am leaving this house, parents are the main reasons why I want to leave.

Being Chinese leaving a house at age 19, especially for a girl is in a way... Controversial. There's so much negative things about moving out at a young age, especially when I am still in school. Whatever is the case, I need to cope with this. I have to do what I think is best for me. It may not seem like I have any Chinese values in me but... I've been taught it in a negative ways. My parents are too traditional and too close mind.

I am going to have difficulty in reuniting my family and not take them for granted for the first few days or weeks or even months. They just have this negative impressions on moving out. I can't even talk to them about it in a calm and respectful ways, I get insulted instead. My parents think they know me and how I will end up in the future. Well, I understand their point of view because I used to think like that. They can't see any positive sides of it because they've never got out of their comfort zone.

I say... Let the controversy begins. I am Chinese and I am moving out!

6 Responses to “My stuff in my new appartment ”

  1. lizajane Says:

    You go girl! I'm sorry they aren't more supportive of your move. It's such an exciting step into adulthood and independence, and it's a shame they aren't encouraging. Maybe after some time they'll get used to the idea, even if they don't love it. Good luck!

  2. NJDebbie Says:

    In a way I understand your parents because their culture is very different from the one you were raised in. The way things are done culturally is ingrained in the fabric of who you are and your parents are acting based upon it.

    I went through a similar situation. I also understand that you want to assert your independence and be on your own and I think that's great. You have to show your parents that you can make it on your own without relaying on them to bail you out financially. Continue to keep the lines of communication open even when you feel they are not supportive of you. Tell them you love them and respect their opinion, but that you are doing this for you. Congratulations on your apartment!

  3. fern Says:

    Congratulations on your new place. You'll do okay. I'm sure your parents will come around eventually, and respect you in the end for what you've done, but you may need to give yourself some space and distance from them for a while until you get settled in.

  4. whitestripe Says:

    i too moved out because i couldn't stand living with my parents. distance yourself for awhile, as it will most likely be hard for you in the first few months as well while you get your head around looking after yourself, so you don't want things to be hard and then have your parents say 'i told you so!'. i suggest once you get everything sorted plan a family outing like a picnic in the park or something.

  5. Analise Says:

    It takes courage to do what you have done but in the end, you are going to be fine. You have an independent spirit that will help you through the bumps. And your parents will eventually "forgive" you.

    When I was your age, I ended up getting married to get away from my parents... it was the only way out for me 40 years ago. (And the marriage eventually ended). Wish I could have done what you are doing instead, but my parents were ultra-traditional and in our culture a woman went from the parents home to the husband's. That was the only option for me.

    My own daughters moved out at age 17 when they went off to college and I totally approved of their independence. They had also lived in Japan in high school as exchange students, so they had experience away from home at a young age.

  6. go.Xtina Says:

    Thanks guys =D

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